December 30, 2011

this mother's heart

The first glance at the clock this morning sent me on a journey back in time.  Fifteen years.
I remember that morning so clearly... waking and feeling my water break.  The relief and giddy laughter, along with packing my bag, that followed.  The trek to the hospital and knowing that this was it.  The pregnancy that almost broke me was ending and my new adventure was just around the bend.

I believe it was all His plan... the tough months of preparation, the early labor... and all of the hope and joy and life that He bundled in this small boy.  While Laura made me a mother, Camden made me more.  For both of them.  I was not unafraid... but when my heart quaked, God stilled it. His sweet smile, full nights of rest, the warmth of his small self... and the laughter that bubbled out of him at the most unlikely moments.

And now he is fifteen.  Fifteen
He is as much a joy to me today as he was then.  Maybe... even more so... as I see this beautiful boy becoming the most generous man.  My heart of thankfulness is certainly overflowing.   And when this mother's heart quakes, I recall how he has taught me to love completely, fight for what is right and laugh with my whole self.  And I am still. 

To my beautiful (um, handsome.  I mean cool.  Or awesome) son... happy birthday.  I love you.

6 comments:

Loui♥ said...

Beautiful!
I feel much the same emotions on the birthday of my son Keith..
Each and everyone of them transports me back to those first moments of eye contact..linking our hearts and souls forever.. and that was almost 45 years ago!!
Forever my darling baby boy, precocious mophaired mucnchkin, trying teener, and finally emerging from the chrysalis to full grown manhood..
Each step of the way, I learned to love more, appreciate more and to respect more of this precious God given gift to me!
and so shall you!
warmest hugs..
Loui♥

Southern Gal said...

Happy Birthday to Camden!

Busy Bee Suz said...

Such a wonderful young man. I mean, cool...awesome!
You could not have made him anymore perfect than he is!!!!
Fifteen??? Sigh.

Gabe said...

Love that phrase. . .but he made me more. . .so, true, so true!!!

Been watching your facebook status. . .sounds like a wonderful few days!

Gayle said...

What a nice-looking young man. My one and only was born Dec. 30th, too. She's 26 now. Time does fly.

jenn said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAMDEN! (the girls still talk about riding the merry-go-round with you!:)