April 15, 2015

my choice...

It was a juggling of the car and an unexpected turn of scheduling that brought me the choice of how to spend an hour or so alone, while Eric went to his appointment. Hobby Lobby?  Or...
 
As I walked along the shoreline, the waves laughed at my state of over-dress, but what is a little salt-water between friends?  Soaked to the knees, I spent the hour thinking, breathing, walking... and enjoyed every minute. My mind worked overtime thinking that summer is coming, and I should do this more often after work.  Then I remembered, I live in summer all-year-round and there is no excuse for missing this beauty that is not all that far west of me...
Some days I collect treasures, but instead I just admired the heart-shaped stones and shells, and let the coquinas dig in peace. My pockets were full enough with my thoughts. There are life changes coming our way, and I want decisions decided, but he still has time. And a little bit of hope was whispered on another front, and my mind is reeling and planning, even though the time for that is probably too far off.

God's timing is perfect... and I need to remember that.  He will bring the answers and the plans in His time, and all I can do is wait. Be still and know. Easier said than done.

At the beach, time you enjoyed wasting, is not time wasted.
-t.s. eliot
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April 10, 2015

friday letters...

Dear Friends,
Here we go... another week gone by. How does this keep happening?! I can't bear to look at the calendar and count, but I know that there aren't too many Friday's between now and Camden's graduation. Now that I've said that, I want to look... but I don't. This is it. Less than two months left of high school. I am excited and ready to be done... but what it really means is that the next countdown will the weeks of summer... until he leaves for college {where ever that may be!}
Dear Weekend Weather,
I don't mean to be bossy, but you need to shape up!
There are hot balloons to be seen and I have a feeling they don't care for rain. Or thunderstorms. Here I go, into weather-denial {it is one of my gifts}... I am confident they will still be inflated, even if they don't fly.
Dear Eric,
You are such a good Dad. Thank you for offering to drive our girl to this concert tonight... I know how much she wants to go. She is sweet enough to feel bad that you are going to drive all that way just to drop her off and then turn around and come home. I love how we can balance each other out in this life of parenting... when I am grumbling, you are the nice one. And when you are fed up, somehow I can move in and smooth things over. And yet we are still {almost always} on the same page. I am so thankful that God matched us up for this journey.

Friends, I hope you have a wonderful {non-stormy} weekend!

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April 07, 2015

taking time...

Even if something is left undone,
everyone must take time to sit still, and watch the leaves turn.
~ Elizabeth Bury Lawrence
This seems to be my theme, even though it is hardly ever leaves. 
I just know that sometimes you have to walk away from even the must-do list to refresh your soul. It is one of the reasons I love to camp... I can just sit and enjoy the beautiful earth, and leave the rest of the world and my worries at home. 

Last night, as I was pushing my shopping cart over towards the cucumbers, I was almost cut off by a maybe-4th-grade-boy pushing his mom's cart. I stopped short and smiled, not the least bit upset. That mom looked at me apologetically, and then counted on her hand and said how many more years? in a way that made me want to cry. I wasn't brave enough to tell her that each moment is precious...

It has been so difficult watching my son as he agonizes over this college decision. Last night he spoke to Karl, an admission counselor for a school he had knocked off his list. Camden hung up the phone, dragged himself to the couch, and buried his head.  And?  He is back to a big three. I don't think this is bad... and I am even kind of over Iowa. He suggested that we play a video game, and while I have no idea how to play {or even the desire!} I knew he needed me to say YES! And so, I did. 

I may not be watching the leaves turn, but I am sitting still in the midst of this beautiful mess. Close enough in case he needs me, but wanting him to stretch those wings he has made strong, and make his right choice, wherever that may be. 

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April 06, 2015

happy easter...

He is risen, He is risen indeed!
I was busy in the kitchen when Eric and Laura got home from singing at the second church service.  It didn't take long for Camden to come in and nudge me.  What? He didn't answer with words, but nudged again, adding a head bob towards the living room. Oh… Yes. He had been waiting patiently to dig in to his Easter basket, and now that Dad and Laura were home, he was ready. I love how the promise of a few silly treats can make an eighteen year old act like he is six.
i love the excitement of that blurry-no-good-photo...
We had a full house for dinner… fifteen. I love to dress the table just-so, and this year I went for green and pink, which made me think preppy every time I turned around. Just after the prayer, I remembered to take a picture… and Bob yelled out no phones at the table! I laughed, snapped a few pictures, and set it aside. I count it as a blessing that it was the only phone by the table, even with the crew of kids.


The day cooled, the sun dipped down, and I didn't want the beautiful day to ever end. I love to have my family together... and I love to see my kids enjoy it just as much. Laura chatted away between the groups of kids and adults, and Camden was himself... more carefree than I have seen him in a handful of weeks. 

I hope your Easter was beautiful... filled with love and hope. 
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