January 02, 2012
when the truth is enough
Somehow though, before the sun even rises, declarations surround us. That this will be the year I... or from now on I will... I resist. Me, who celebrates everything and gathers tradition tight to my heart... I resolve nothing. I think I am afraid. Or just, in one small instance, practical. In all of my failing ways, I know that next time December comes around, I do not want to recall the ugliness of a broken resolution, or how I gave up, failed. Again.
Yes, there are ways I want to change... things that I want to banish... more I want to accomplish. But to declare it... makes me want to run and hide. So I keep my dreams close to my heart, I speak them in prayer to the One who loves me anyway. And when I fall short, when I feel broken and not enough, I can know one thing. I am a child of God... and succeed or fail, He loves me. No goal or dream or word is more powerful than that.
So when the world has travelled her path once more, and at the end of everyday from now til then... I will know I lived in the truth. A truth that comes to me rightly, and lovingly. In all of the hope and love and living, I am a child of God, and that has to be enough... because it is everything.