October 15, 2013

where the breathing is easy...

It has been a mess of days and I wonder if I can even think about reclaiming this ordinary train of thought. Weeks of words coming and going, getting lost in my aching head, with not a lick of motivation to trek back and find them.  This morning, my words are bubbling through the fog of it all, but I am unsure if they will tell a story at the end, or just be a splattered mess.

Even this... is ordinary.
This sick that lingers.  My breath gripped with bronchitis.  And a list of medical to-do's that rivals the grocery list I can't seem to put together anyway.  I can't escape this season of sick, year after year, and just do my best to catch it early.   Even then, it is a tough, long road back to easy breathing... and not just in the healing. So much gets pushed to the side, and that stack of what waits, weighs down my heart.  And my guys... oh they put up with a lot!  Too much whining, too much serving, not enough me.  I am anxious to turn that corner to well, where the breathing is easy... and I'm hopeful that in itself might be a good sign.

But even in this... life moves forward and I can see the cycle of a beautiful life play out before me.  Morning goodbyes while the light filters in the window,  steamy coffee,  and a cozy spot to rest.  When the clock teeters past noon, I know it won't be long before Cam walks in the door... and even though he ends up buried in homework across the house, just knowing he's there begins the full of evening.  The bustle of dinner in the kitchen nudges me from my weariness and the golden light streaming in makes me smile.  A full house. It is what I like best.  And while I'm battling my way back to well, it is those little bits of ordinary are light to the dark days...

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6 comments:

Southern Gal said...

I should have known. I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time, Dawn. Praying you are well soon!

Busy Bee Suz said...

I had no idea you were battling again. I'm so sorry my friend. I hope you are feeling like your sweet self real soon. XOXO

Baby Rocket Dog and Hootie said...

Awww sweetie, sure hope you get this sick beat soon and are back to normal. I didn't think folks got sick in Florida! Sent up a prayer for you.
XX-Cassie

Richella Parham said...

Just a quick note to say hi. I hope and pray that by now you are completely well and that this early bout of labored breathing was short-lived.

Love you, friend!

Mindy Whipple said...

I was away for a time and missed this post - praying for healing for you Dawn and much easier breathing.

Kay said...

Oh honey...I am so sorry! I have had bronchitis ONCE and felt as though it was the plague that would never leave. Hang in there. Hugs and prayers to you, my friend. : )