In the moment I felt undermined and frustrated... and as if my very calling of being a mother was being questioned. In thinking it all over, again and again, running it all again in my mind, and then mulling and dwelling, the clarity is setting in… and I can see that my response was less about a Mama protecting her cub and more about this Mama protecting her spot in her cub’s life. And I can be honest enough to admit that mine was a reaction to an unintentional action. But unintentional or not, it doesn’t really make it hurt any less. And even on a good day I question my own abilities as a mother, coming to the conclusion that my kids make me look really good. I really don't need any help in feel less. I trust you, Jesus.
I know I have a right to my own feelings… and while I would not hurt anyone intentionally, sometimes you have to stand up and not be walked over… again and again. I am a believer in picking your battles. I suppose yesterday’s was one of them. I have support. And love. And now, a barrier with a little bit thicker walls. I’m not sure Jesus likes that part, but for right now, I need it. And still... I am trusting Him.