I try not to lean too far to one side... or spin too quickly to the other. Even one degree of movement seems precarious. The air feels electric and fragile... and to venture too far from this one little spot might be its very undoing.
As I stand, I know... that life hangs in the balance.
Heartbeats and breath and the unknown... balanced on the edge of living.
Hanging on, fighting. Waiting.
The air around me seems to close in just little more as I seek the beautiful words of prayer.
Lashes flutter down, and in my own created darkness, I can push the air away without it shattering and I seek their faces in my heart. My soul begins...
Father God, precious Jesus...
The beautiful words... they will not come.
Only a moment of desperation passes before He provides me with the familiar rhythm of the prayer I know best, and I am thankful.
Our Father, which art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy Kingdom come,
thy will be done,
in earth as it is in heaven
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive them that trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory,
for ever and ever.
I know that if I repeat them over and over, and then over again...
He will know my heart and the peace it longs for...