February 11, 2013
with angel wings
It makes me squirm to say it. Uncomfortable and embarrassing... but He still promises to meet me where I am. Just so happens that today that place is a big 'ol Eeyore sized pity-party. My gray droopy streamers are just as I want them and the balloons are all deflated on the cold dark floor. The truth is, I'm okay. It is nothing life-threatening... just icky.
So why do I blurt it out at all?
To keep it all in, means leaving the blessings locked away in darkness... and they are good.
Oh-so-good that they deserve the be celebrated.
To keep it all in would mean that I could not share the fact that during pre-op, I was in Ann's hospital, and came to know immediately why she loved it so. Every person showed such care to me, and I was so reminded of her. The tears fell while my blood filled vial after vial... and that led to sharing about my beautiful friend. The travelling nurse had only heard of her, but through me, she was overjoyed to know her. Faith was shared and embraced, and I left that small room feeling Ann smiling around me. Blessed.
To keep it all in would mean that you would not hear my gasp when my pre-surgery nurse introduced herself as... Angel. And there it was, right on her name tag. And then? The OR nurse? She had a lovely colorful angel pinned right on her scrubs, and when I complimented it, it was her gasp I heard as she shared that it was for her granddaughter...
To keep it all in would mean that my dear friends and family, who have checked on me daily and prayed for me at every turn, might not know how much I appreciate them, or how loved they make me feel. Like Facebook on your birthday. Yep. That great.
And so the story will go on... ugly pain mixed with the most lovely blessings.
God doesn't take the ugly lightly, you know... and He cares so much that He paints right over it with love. You just have to push the gloomy streamers out of the way to see his masterpiece...
Posted by Dawn