April 25, 2011

recalling the beautiful

Slipping into my shoes, I feel the dusting of sand that remains... and I smile. 
It reminds me of where I've been, where he took me, where I worshipped...

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I all but rushed the walkway to lot 3.

As we drove across town my eyes were on the sky and the numbers on the clock.  Sun sinking, minutes passing.  Inside, I was second guessing the laid back attitude I had adopted for the afternoon, even knowing that this plan, this gift, loomed before me. On the outside I fought for calm... as the light flashed to red, again.  But after, with miles of green, I breathed easier.  We should get there and still have 35 minutes.    Up and over the hill, the very last stretch before the gate... almost there!  In front of us, the last car between us and our destination stopped... and let one group cross, and then another... and... one more. Typically-generous-of-soul me growled as moments (feeling like minutes) passed, and another car turned in front of us, arriving at the gate just before we did.  They chatted with the park ranger as my feet tapped up and down, up and down... and my breathe raced in and out, in and out.  Thirty minutes!  Finally, it was us passing through the gate, and as we did, I noticed that the time of sunset, scrawled in chalk, was five minutes later than we had anticipated.  Still, thirty-five!

I practically raced up and over the boardwalk, but catching sight of the crashing waves, I slowed and inhaled.  And inhaled again.  I let the crazy pass.  I stopped counting the minutes.  They no longer mattered.  And with my feet finally in the sand, waves swirling at my ankles and splashing my knees... I exhaled.  And I gave thanks. 

Some would rise early for the sunrise, welcoming the dawn and the risen Christ.  But I watched the molten sun melt into the sea, and felt the promise of the new day just the same, knowing that my sins were sunk deep on the ocean floor.  And I give thanks again... for knowing the glory that the morning holds, for knowing that that stone has been rolled away and He lives.

He chose to take the cross, shed tears for the lost,
The broken and the needy, forgiving those who were and will be,
The angel made it clear, he told them, "Have no fear!
He's not here, He's not here!"

There He goes, a hero, Savior to the world,
Here He stands with scars in His hands,
With love He gave his life so we could be free,
The Savior of the world.
-lyrics from Hero, Abandon

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And there must be more...
125. more time to rest
126. sore throat retreating
127. a little bit of energy to get a head start on cleaning
128. reigning myself in and getting down to the heart of Easter week
129. high school orientation, and his dreams
130. piano music, played with confidence, by Cam
131. her excitement over a dress dyed green
132. working hard to catch up on lost work time, and her insistance that I leave early
133. the weekend, the weekend, the weekend... for all of us.
134. fresh hair cuts
135. the phone call he made, for me, in secret... and the invitation that followed
136. african cats, the movie
137. time for us to shop and plan... and the discovery of the cadbury bunny that clucks
138. getting ready for Good Friday service, even though I'm never ready
139. hearing the good news of Good Friday, and finally understanding
140. the old rugged cross
141. the way we leave in silence, but reach out to hold hands and offer a smile, the knowing of what comes on Sunday.
142. fear of a situation, and it turning out better than alright
143. the flurry of working together and bringing the house to order
144. time decorating eggs with a little one... and the wonder of it
145. golden sun shining through blades of grass

146. five more minutes
147. the beach + me= beauty in the soul
148. taking in the sight of him, long legs, handsome face... catching my breath
149. the light bar on the squad car being the perfect height to use the self-timer
150. alleluias, once again. praise God!
151. singing the songs that celebrate His promise
152. her smile and the light in her eyes over a silly solar flower... and the fact that I remembered she wished for it
153. the most beautiful comment from someone whose friendship makes my own heart more beautiful
154. family and friends gathered... celebrating, chatting, living...
155. the ultimate compliment... your kids are really great.  really, they are awesome.

8 comments:

gabe said...

#155. . .really, what more could a mother ask for, right??

I am so jealous that you are so close to the ocean. . .and I love the idea of our sins being taken to the bottom of the ocean.

Beautiful list!

Corinne said...

We spent last night at the beach as well... :) what a beautiful activity to bring focus to the day! xoxo

Busy Bee Suz said...

I felt like I was traveling with you...towards your destination. SO glad you made it...and enjoyed it.
Love your list. You are so wonderful, sweet and amazing.
xoxox

Busy Bee Suz said...

Oh, and that family photo is beyond perfect!!!!

Craig said...

A slave to the minutes – instead of mastering them. I know this too well. Sunsets are sunrises – and Sunrises are sunsets – just in reverse order. I have no children – save a sister who since my mom died has been like a daughter – so I know only snippets of what this felt like – my favorite from your list: 155. the ultimate compliment... your kids are really great. really, they are awesome. And that is 9358 shades of awesome – and then a little more. {smile} Thank you for this, God Bless you and all of yours Dawn.

Southern Gal said...

It wouldn't do for me to live nearer than the 2 1/2 hours from the ocean than I do. So #147? I'm so there.
#155 - such a wonderful feeling.

kelly said...

Ahh...peace. I was hoping that's how the story ended. Beautiful photos! :)

tracie @ {tsj} photography said...

hello sweet friend! loving the photo of you and your family!