True friendship means not trying to out-do each other... and I am thankful that I do not have relationships that encourage me to try to out-do someone else. That being said- we all have things in our lives that out-do others without the tiniest bit of effort! For example, no one could ever out-do my friend Becky's water emergencies- no one! And really, who would want to! I think that everything they own has at one time gushed water onto their floor or out their walls. It's almost laughable. If she called me tonight and told me she had a geyser coming out of her microwave, I would not be surprised. Really. Yesterday I called her, to chat, and told her I had my own "water emergency" type of story! She was shocked, until I told her- remember, water is not our thing, our thing is more... medical maladies. Oh yes- hole in your heart, scarlet fever times two, oozy ear, emergency appendectomy, passing out... that's more our style! And so... here goes:
Saturday, around noon, I picked up my lovely daughter from her sleepover party (remember- books at midnight!), and I was starving... starving! So I decided to fly through the McD's drive though and get a Happy Meal. Waiting our turn, Laura decided that she was not hungry, but could she have a bottle of water? Before I could say yes, she was trying to roll down the window and was throwing up (darn those backseat-I-only-go-down-half-way-windows!) We pulled out of line to clean up- thankfully, Laura had not eaten anything yet and so there was not much to actually clean up... so I was not grossed out and proceeded to buy my "Happy Meal." We went home, she slept and I read and enjoyed my Saturday afternoon... until I started feeling queasy myself! Before I knew it, I was making myself quite comfortable in the bathroom... pillow on the hamper so that I could rest my nauseous head while I sat... and sat... and sat. Sunday morning was worse- and I didn't really think it could get any worse. Laura woke up feeling great though and took good care of me until the boys arrived home from their camping trip. When I was finally able to lift my head a little, Eric showed me this weird rash he had on his hand... great. At least it wasn't itchy. My saga continued... not much changed for me... but, having a long time to contemplate it, I decided that I really do like the shade in the master bath... and I think we really need to paint in there! When Eric got home from work Monday night, he tried to take me to the doctor, but we had to cancel because I could not get to the car, never mind make it all the way into town. It turned out to be a good thing though, because moments later we got a call from Gran- Laura had just passed out at Publix! (I know, the week just keeps getting better and better!) Luckily, there was an off duty paramedic buying his groceries, and he took good care of my girl... and Gran! So, now it's Tuesday, and Eric was determined to get me to the doctor. With a little help from Pepto, I did make it... and told Eric that since we were going, he should get his hand looked at- the rash was getting bumpy. They put us in a room together, where we had the slowest nurse ever look after us. She was nice- just slow. Finally, the nurse practitioner took over and she started asking questions: when did it start? what did you eat? have you had abdominal surgery? have you had your gall bladder out? Oh my- gall bladder??? I started picturing how lovely my matching scars would look- I looked at Eric and we just laughed. If this was my gall bladder, it would certainly be par for the course! And she looked at Eric's hand- more questions, and then she dragged a doctor in for show and tell! After blood work for both of us (the same nurse took our blood... slowly) we left with a diagnosis of food poisoning for me (she thinks it was my "Happy Meal!"), and a puzzled look for Eric, along with a prescription (that seems to be working pretty nicely!) Home to rest... and move on from being sick! But wait- there's more! One more frantic phone call... Camden just threw up! Thankfully, it was just once (like Laura) and by Wednesday morning, we were all on the mend. Thank goodness. It does feel like we have lost a week though, thanks to that "Happy Meal" that was not exactly... happy. But sometimes, you just gotta laugh... it's better than the alternative!!